What I didn’t Expect About Pregnancy

When I got pregnant I knew it was going to be an adventure. The only pregnant person I have ever been around was my sister and that was over seven years ago. I am the first one of my friends to be going through this amazing time in our lives (Though I now have a very happy BFF who is also expecting a little one in April!!) and so I knew to expect a little but there was so So SO much more that I didn’t expect. Here is my list…

  1. Hair Growth in UNWANTED Places: Okay so not to get gross right away but hair grows EVERYWHERE when you are knocked up. I really started noticing this when I was looking at my arms and those little freckles we all have were suddenly growing a few dark strands out of them. SERIOUSLY!?! Totally not expecting that to ever happen. Needless to say tweezers became my best friend and I am not even going to go into all the other places I have noticed unwanted hair.
  2. Kleenex Please: At first I just thought my constant runny nose was related to a cold I might have been getting or just normal pre-summer allergies that I sometimes get, but NO I have now been dealing with a runny nose everyday since the start of June. Luckily there is this amazing brand called Puff Plus Lotion that has saved my poor nose from looking like Rudolph the red nose reindeer.
  3. Please Just Chop them OFF: And no I am not talking about my sore breasts (that was one thing I was actually prepared for); I am talking about those two sticks that come out of your body that help you move from point A to point B. Yes LEGS!!! I am prone to leg cramps I get them at least once a month while in a peaceful slumber when my body decides to twist the wrong way. So you would think I would be fine in this category. WRONG!! It’s not just the occasional leg cramp that I am experiencing but this constant tingling sensation and no position seems to help. It just feels like I need to stretch my legs every three minutes but if I do that in the wrong way BAM hello leg cramp! I so hope this goes away as soon as this little guy is born or I will seriously start thinking about getting that chain saw.
  4. How Did You Get There: I was prepared for acne on my face, been dealing with that since I was a teenager (just like every other women on the planet) and I have definitely been battling with it; however I was not prepared to see the same unwanted acne that belongs on your face on the sides of my stomach. Seriously who ever gets acne there??? I am sure part of it is from the daily routine I do to try and keep stretch marks at bay but even before I did that I started to get them. This is one of those things I think pregnancy books should have warned us about; HOW RUDE!!
  5. ouch Ouch OUCH!!: I am not a huge fan of shaving my legs in general but apparently when you get pregnant this gets taken to a whole new level. I would shave my legs and no matter how I did it or how much shaving cream I used I would get cuts and razor burn. Now this is not normal for me; normally I cut myself shaving once every couple months not every flippin time. I was seriously thinking about just not shaving all together until baby arrived when my saving grace showed up on a forum from one of the baby sites I stalk… The trick is to use a guys razor and then to add to that I have found that using coconut oil with your shaving cream makes for the perfect concoction on NO CUT shaving. Once again this would have been nice to know back in June when I first started hating my legs instead of having to figure it out on my own in September!! That was three months of unnecessary pain.
  6. Well HELLO there Handsome: I just kind of figured that my sex drive would drop one I was pregnant. I mean really who wants to even think about that with a baby on the way right?? NOT THIS MOMMA TO BE… I have had the very opposite thing happen to me when it comes to that area. I have felt sexy even as my belly has been getting bigger and bigger; in fact I probably am at my highest level of self-esteem when it comes to the looks area right now. All in all not a bad place to be though I will admit that as I’m inching closer to thirty weeks my full throttle drive is slowing down to N…
  7. Can’t you smell the neighbors three doors down are making hamburgers: Being able to smell EVERYTHING and I mean everything from a very long distance away has maybe been my favorite unexpected pregnancy symptom. I fortunately tend to smell out the good things instead of the bad so my little world is always surrounded by the best smells. I however was not excpecting to be able to smell things from so far away, I mean really I could tell you what the entire street was making for dinner!!! I am hoping this amazing super women sense of smell I have goes away as soon as my little one is here so all those unpleasent smells are not magnified. HAHA!
  8. Need a Kleenex? No thanks I’m good really: I was under the impression that pregnant ladies cry A LOT and sometimes with no reason behind it other then their hormones made them. So thinking this would be me no doubt with my past teenage years of drama (I use to cry at everything until I reached my mid twenties) I prepared Sean to have lots of Kleenex on hand. The only problem here is I have only cried a grand total of four times this entire pregnancy. WAIT that doesn’t seem right!?! I KNOW but its true. I had the typical I am pregnant and super excited but super scared crying episode (Legitimate reason #1), Sean fell asleep before me and now is snoring crying episode (Pregnancy hormones Reason #1), ruined my mac & cheese so I cried on the floor for an hour episode (Pregnancy hormones strike again), and I have gestational diabetes how did this happen crying episode (Legitimate reason #2)… That’s it folks… No crying because something happened on TV or because I saw this women pushing her baby in a stroller down the street. No freaking out at Sean for no reason and scaring him away. Zip, 0, None!!! I wonder if this trend will continue once he is born??
  9. You can turn to the right now:– Babies move inside your tummy, that’s a given and I was prepared for him to do all that crazy kicking everyone talks about. I didn’t however expect him to push and push and push on my left side thinking eventually there will be more room for him over there. NEWS FLASH little one all you need to do is turn and head to the right side of mommies belly I promise there is plenty of unused space over there for your enjoyment.
  10. But you look so small for seven months: (Why thank you random people who keep telling me I look small, its nice to hear when I feel like a beached whale some days) I was prepared to be big, fat, and happily pregnant and when I say prepared to be big I mean HUGE. My mom gained a ton of weight when she had me and so everyone in my family kept saying how big I was going to get and to just be prepared for it because that was most likely a genetic thing and nothing I could avoid. Well sorry family but you were all WRONG… I am currently 29 weeks along and have only gained 13 pounds, now granted I could and will go through a major weight gain in the near future because that’s what all Mommas-to-be go through in their last few weeks but I don’t see this gaining 50 pounds ordeal happening to me. Score one for me!!

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